English jokes

    THE TEST
       
      During a  visit to a mental hospital, a  visitor  asked the Director  
what the criterion was that defined  whether  or  not a  patient should be 
institutionalized.
       
      "Well,"  said  the Director, "we fill up  a bathtub; then we offer  a 
teaspoon, a  teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask  him  or her to
      empty it."
       
      "Oh, I  understand," said the visitor. "A  normal   person would  use the 
bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup.
       
      "No,"  said the  Director, "A normal  person would pull the plug. Do  you 
want a bed by the wall or near   the  window?"
       
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      LA PRUEBA
       
      Durante la visita a una al hospital psiquiátrico, un  visitante le 
preguntó al Director cuál era el criterio que definía si un  paciente debía ser 
internado o no.
       
      "Bueno,"  dijo el  Director, "llenamos una tina; luego le ofrecemos una 
cucharita, una  taza o una cubeta al paciente y le pedimos que la vacíe"
       
      "O, comprendo,"  dijo el visitante. "  Una persona normal utilizaría la 
cubeta porque es más grande que la cuchara y  la taza"
       
      "No," dijo el Director, "Una persona  normal hubiera halado el tapón. 
¿Dónde quiere su cama, por la pared o cerca de  la ventana?"
           
    
       
      The Oldest of All
       
      A group of women met in Court, each accusing the others of causing  
problems in the apartment block in which they lived.
       
      The judge, seeing a quite complicated case, said out loud what he  
thought would be a judgement of Solomon.
       
      "Very well! I am ready to hear the evidence. I will hear the oldest  of 
you first "
       
      The case was closed for lack of witnesses.
           
    
       
      A doctor  was having an affair with his nurse. Shortly afterward, she 
told him she was  pregnant. Not wanting his wife to know, he gave the nurse a 
sum of money and  asked her to go to Italy and have the baby there. 
  
  ?But how will I let you know the baby is born?? she asked. He replied, ?Just  
send me a postcard and write 'spaghetti' on the back. I'll take care of  
expenses.? 
  
  Not knowing what else to do, the nurse took the money and flew to Italy. 
  
  Six months went by and then one day the doctor's wife called him at the 
office  and explained, ?Dear, you received a very strange postcard in the mail 
today  from Europe, and I don't understand what it  means.? 
  
  The doctor said, ?Just wait until I get home and I will explain it to you?.  
Later that evening, the doctor came home, read the postcard, fell to the floor  
with a heart attack. Paramedics rushed him to the ER. The lead medic stayed  
back to comfort the wife. He asked what trauma had precipitated the cardiac  
arrest. 
  
  So the wife picked up the card and read, ?Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti,  
Spaghetti - Two with sausage and meatballs, two without?.
       
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 Preguntá. Respondé. Descubrí.
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 Probalo ya! 

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