Re: Linguist jokes: At the pearly gates

And the software engineer -

That was the demo version.

Jane Cates
> And there is the version about presidents--The Devil looks at him, smiles
> slyly, and purrs, "Yesterday we were campaigning; today you voted for us."
>
> At 01:21 PM 4/30/2004 -0400, Michael J. Smith wrote:
> >On Friday 30 April 2004 12:34 pm, John McChesney-Young wrote:
> > > Although technically off-topic, I'm sure quite a few list members
> > > will enjoy this and a large sub-set could turn out a classicist
> > > version without much trouble, if they felt so inclined.
> > >
> > > http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/000837.html
> >
> >O rare Roman Jakobson! There is a version about Bill Gates:
> >
> >  Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being
> > sized
> >up by St. Peter.
> >
> >"Well, Bill, I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all,
> >you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in
> >America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do
> >something I've never done before; I'm going to let you decide where you want
> >to go."
> >
> >Bill replied, "well, what's the difference between the two?" St. Peter said,
> >"I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly."
> >
> >"Okay then," said Bill, "Let's try Hell first."
> >
> >So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear 
> >waters
> >and lots of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing
> >and frolicking about. The sun was shining; the temperature perfect.
> >
> >"This is great!" he told St. Peter. "If this is hell, I REALLY want to see
> >heaven!"
> >
> >"Fine," said St. Peter, and off they went.
> >
> >Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing
> >harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell.
> >
> >Bill thought for a quick minute. "Hmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told St.
> >Peter.
> >
> >"Fine," retorted St. Peter, "as you desire."
> >
> >So Bill Gates went to Hell.
> >
> >Two weeks later, St. Peter decided to check on the late billionaire. When he
> >got there, he found Bill, shackled to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in
> >dark caves, being burned and tortured by demons.
> >
> >"How's everything going?" he asked Bill.
> >
> >Bill responded, with his voice filled with anguish and disappointment, "This
> >is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can't
> >believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with the
> >beautiful beaches, the beautiful women playing in the water?!???
> >
> >"That? Oh, that was just the demo."
> >
> >--
> >    Michael J. Smith
> >    ms@xxxxxx
>
>
> Ling Ouyang
> http://janusquirinus.org/